The ‘Cool Girl’ Syndrome Is Making You Miserable

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This is the girl everyone likes. She is outgoing, fun, gorgeous, and a real friend, however, this ended up being too far-fetched.

It seems like such girls tend to be emotionally neglected, and very often get disrespected unfairly and always get less than what they bargained for. So, the big question is – why is it so?

These ultra-powered, ultimate partner ladies, laid-back and easy-going individuals are dream partners, however, the cool girl meaning has taken another dimension.

We will try to explain the backstory of the cool girl syndrome, what it means, why is it ruining her well-being and keeping her from healthy relationships.

What is the ‘Cool Girl’ Syndrome?

A cool girl is a helpful, go-with-the-flow, attractive, flexible, and undemanding type of girlfriend. There are plenty more adjectives to describe a cool girl, but the overall explanation is mainly connected to her actions and behavior. They are easy to talk to, cool girls are always ready for challenges, and such young ladies are utterly eclectic and easy to be with, but above all, she is a perfect relationship candidate.

So why is there so much commotion about the cool girl? The answer is plain simple – they are too tolerant and perfect. When a partner gets used to his girl constantly being cool and never demanding, when the time comes for her to ask for something or express her frustration about anything, no matter how big or small that ‘thing’ might be, he would get puzzled.

The dangers behind the cool girl syndrome lie in the mentality and how seemingly “low maintenance” behavior can have a bad effect on the relationship instead of a good one.

The Impact on Mental Health

For a girl with such syndrome, feelings can either manifest in a wrongful manner, completely backfire or get neglected. The key is to take time to think deeply about what you want and need, and then slowly work towards changing them.

Being tolerant and communicating your needs is the recipe for a successful relationship, but things can go south if you have a girlfriend with a cool girl syndrome. For the impact on mental health to be altered or maximally minimized, she must face some challenges and stand up for herself.

Unless a cool girl alters her chain of thought, there could be some severe mental health issues that would only prolong the agony and make you more miserable.

Some of the obstacles are the following:

Emotional Suppression

Sure, being tolerant and understanding can help us get what we desire in a relationship, right? With the cool girl, things are not always that simple. The secret behind the easy-going girl’s meaning entails that her character and nature are always flexible and tolerant, but some men get used to that far too seriously and then stop paying attention to their mental and emotional well-being.

What does a cool girl do then? You’ve guessed it, she suppresses her feelings in order to maintain the serenity and good relationship vibes.

The truth is, when such ladies hold back, neglect the truths, stop people pleasing habits, and avoid talking about what is important to them, people get disappointed, even though such things are normal in a relationship. Instead of speaking her mind, she holds back her emotions and this is why being a cool girl is making her feel miserable.

Identity Erosion

The innate feelings and behavior behind the easy going girl meaning lead to losing her true self. With time, external factors such as a partner’s distraction, diluted attention, constant adjustment to other people, and poor choices trigger identity erosion which affects her total self-perception.

No, a cool girlfriend doesn’t have to do whatever she is told to, neither that’s the case, but subconsciously her cool girl syndrome kicks in, and she makes choices that please others rather than her. This is the reason people perceive her wrongfully, and this is where she can slowly lose her identity and distract herself from the people who truly care for her.

Relationship Strain

When you have a habit of regularly tolerating someone’s sh**ty behavior, there’ll come a time when you’ll totally lose it. Communicating your needs and wishes is an important factor in any relationship, but for someone who has such a complicated syndrome, things are a little bit different.

When a partner’s behavior doesn’t thoroughly match up with what we expect and want, there can be relationship strains, excuses, and nitpicky outcomes. Another reason for a cool girl to feel miserable.

Breaking Free for the ‘Cool Girl’ Trap

Why can’t a cool girl have needs, desires, and even high expectations like any other normal human being in a relationship? And what does it mean when a man or a woman is cool? Is she smart? Is she talkative? Or is she just ‘the’ girl who will accept it all and won’t have realistic demands? If you think the answer is ‘yes’, you thought wrong!

They also have feelings and needs, and they also need more in a relationship, so they ought to break free from this trap. For a cool girl to be perceived differently, she needs to alter her attitude, start being taken seriously, be rightful but also direct, and stop people pleasing. Do the following:

Embrace Authenticity

The best way for your partner and friends to portray you the way you are is to accept your behavior and actions. However, in order for them to do that, a cool girl must reshape her opinion a bit, and start prioritizing being true to herself over conforming to others’ unrealistic demands and expectations.

Embracing authenticity is the most profound way to build genuine and deserving relationships. There’s no shame in speaking your mind, enhancing your true self, and inviting people around you to see and expect the real you, no matter how harmful that can be.

Set Boundaries

It’s only logical to want to express your needs and desires. Many cool girls have a plethora of other worries besides being emotionally taken for granted. They are left behind, they can’t afford friends’ spending habits and keep up with their gregarious behavior all the time.

This has to stop if you want to be taken seriously. There’s absolutely no reason to sacrifice your mental and physical well-being so you would meet someone’s unrealistic expectations.

Therefore, it’s essential to set boundaries in terms of specifying what you prefer doing, sending messages to let people know that you are feeling left out, being open about making you feel uncomfortable and striving to enhance healthy relationships that are built on mutual respect. This takes time, patience, and a lot of effort, otherwise, the cool girl syndrome will not cease.

Redefine ‘Cool’

Is a cool girl only a trend? Is this notion something a person should be okay with? Can such feelings last forever? Should she just alter her behavior and face reality? The answer lies in the balance. If the meaning of ‘cool’ entails being easy-going, uplifted, and happy in a special manner, so be it!

For your partner and loved ones to expect you for who you are, you need to challenge the idea of being a cool chick meaning it is all about being flexible, open-minded, and unique. Redefine the cool girl syndrome by utilizing self-respect, being true to your needs, and stopping rationalizing unreasonable behavior.

Final thoughts

To get the story short, never suffer in silence, don’t do what people expect you to do, learn how to communicate your needs, and don’t assume that your partner knows what you want in a relationship. If you were to follow these steps, the cool girl syndrome would be a thing of the past.

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