Photo by César O’neill
There are times you can easily spot red flags in a relationship, but unfortunately, there are times when you fail to notice small but worrying issues. Relationships are a work in progress, but when there are so many little and suspicious behaviors you need to pay attention to, a person can go crazy, right?
Let’s not start panicking girls (just yet) because even though there are a number of tricky and notable behaviors worth noting in a relationship such as love bombing, negging, and other manipulative activities, breadcrumbing might be the worst.
If you think that you are experiencing breadcrumbing in a relationship but cannot detect whether this is what’s happening to you or if you cannot precisely pinpoint if your partner is breadcrumbing, we are here to help clear out any doubts.
Here is a thorough guide to one of the most mischievous and unfair relationship behaviors, detection tricks, examples, and help on how to respond to breadcrumbing and stop once and for all.
What does breadcrumbing mean?
First things first, let’s clear out the never-ending dilemma of this popular relationship red flag and finally clear out what breadcrumbing means.
Put plainly, breadcrumbing is when one person in a relationship or a dating phase tends to “feed” another person with breadcrumbs or give them small doses of attention and hope in numerous forms, just like giving a hungry person breadcrumbs and leaving him hungry with no inclination that you would give them any more food.
The comparison may sound sad, but examples of breadcrumbing in relationships are just the same. Hence, breadcrumbing in a relationship means getting little bits of care and affection without any signs of possible change for the better.
What is breadcrumbing in dating?
Basically, this is when a person whom you are dating starts offering you little doses of attention without any meaningful interest in you and/or no real futuristic hope for a serious relationship whatsoever.
When the breadcrumber starts periodically “feeding” other people with little bits of attention, they might be just dragging the dating phase without any inclination that they even want to start a relationship.
On the other hand, very often they have no desire to make it past the dating phase and make an honest and real connection, or they are just enjoying the current state and do not want anything more. In any case – it does sound bad!
Breadcrumbing in relationship
When it comes to being in a relationship, things are only a tad bit different. Although, it’s far more common to experience breadcrumbing during the dating phase, if you practice healthy communication, you can stop this behavior before any sort of serious moves and commitment.
In other cases, many people have reported being subjected to breadcrumbing during a few months of a relationship as well but not being fully aware of it. This happens when you are in a romantic relationship and start expecting more from your partner, but they don’t want to move forward.
Also, it’s quite possible to see examples of breadcrumbing when you wish to turn a situationship into a relationship, and then the partner starts backing down by offering you less and less care and affection.
What starts as “friends with benefits” or a quick “booty call” relationship can turn into a situationship where there are no strings attached. However, if it ends up becoming a relationship in the end, the partner might still start to breadcrumb, especially if there are no talking stage good signs, or any signs of improvement whatsoever. Therefore, breadcrumbing in a relationship means constantly leaving you empty-handed, neglected, and left out of important things.
Breadcrumbing in a long-term relationship
Yep, this can happen as well, no questions about it. According to relationship experts and renowned experts, breadcrumbing can occur during the dating phase, in a romantic relationship, but also in serious or long term relationships, even marriage.
However, breadcrumbing in a long term relationship looks a bit different than breadcrumbing meaning in a relationship.
For instance, when a long-term partner keeps deflating his promises or never seems to show his care and affection to demonstrate “real” emotional ability in terms of romantic gestures, such as not sending flowers on anniversaries, going out for walks or dates, then this is breadcrumbing in a long term relationship or marriage.
No interest in what your better half’s doing, no care, no affection, and no intricacy for years are all examples of breadcrumbing in a long term relationship.
Why do men breadcrumb?
Okay, we don’t need to put all things on men, but it just seems so factual that men breadcrumb the most. And why is that? Simply – they always just want to have fun!
Even if most girls want the same thing, after a certain period, or when the situationship turns into something serious, or when you feel that you are more than just friends with benefits, it’s always the girl that wants something more, not the men. So, what to do when a man breadcrumbs you?
If you like him, start building a strong foundation in a relationship, open up to him, and propose a normal relationship. And if you don’t like him that much – say goodbye. There’s no need to get bits and pieces of someone’s affection just because they feel like feeding you crumbs.
How to deal with breadcrumbing?
There’s no right answer here, because it is utterly understandable to be apprehensive about telling your partner your worries and concerts, especially if you have noticed that you were being fed crumbs or bits of pieces of affection. There are, though, a few ways to approach this problem in a relationship.
Firstly, reach out to your partner by telling him that you feel as if you are being breadcrumbed, highlighting the need to practice healthy communication, explain how you noticed such issues, and be prepared for any outcome. Specify that you have noticed some breadcrumbing signs that you found disturbing and that you wish to discuss them.
By approaching your partner about being breadcrumbed, you might reach a silver lining and move past some things, on the other hand, if you don’t communicate your feelings, you might get stuck in the loophole and continue having unsuitable relationships.
All in all, even though there’s no right way to figure out how to deal with breadcrumbing, you can still easily spot if you are being misled or manipulated in a relationship so you should never get past that. Use your lady “radar” to detect any form of breadcrumbing behavior and do your magic to get away from that relationship.
